Does dealing with 2 kids really take four times the effort ?

Before we had Ishaan, we had heard that with 2 kids, its not double the work, but its really four times the work. In a way, I disagree with that statement. Yes, it is certainly more work.. But not four times.. It may seem four times sometimes due to the nature of work.

So, how has my experience been so far ? Well, my experience is that we have to spend more time with Kavya than Ishaan and since Kavya is at an age where she kind of understands everything, but then has a mind of her own, it becomes extremely challenging to not loose patience and calm. For Ishaan, he needs to be fed and changed and put to bed as per his routine and thats pretty much it. He is now getting to a point where he is enjoying interaction and loves to talk and hence demands attention.

But for Kavya - we need to have her routine pretty much the same way as it was before Ishaan and also make sure that she does not feel jealous. So, for almost a month after we had Ishaan, Gaurav would spend most of his time with Kavya - trying to keep her happy and occupied while I took some rest to recover and took care of Ishaan's basic needs.

For most part, Kavya does not seem to feel jealous. Sometimes, she does want to be held and fed like Ishaan - but then what do you expect from a 3 year old ? She likes to be involved with Ishaan. Most of the times, when we need to change Ishaan's diaper, Kavya will run and get us the diaper and wipes. She also likes to hold Ishaan in her lap. She tries to play with him with rattle and other toys, but soon realizes that he is too little to play.

My advice for any parents who are even planning on having 2nd kid would be to keep the age difference to under 3-4 years. Yes, it will be little difficult for you in the beginning, but in the long run, the siblings will bond better - atleast that's been my experience growing up.

I am looking forward to few months down the road when Ishaan and Kavya will play together and then we will not have to worry about attention and jealously any more.. Of course, then there will be fights and new challenges :)